While chasing the eldest, I wondered how the trees did it. How do the trees keep standing strong with so much going on around them. Squirrels run through their branches. Vines grow all over them. Rabbits and other small rodents build nests at their feet. Insects eat their leaves. Birds peck at them. Parasitic plants grow all over their trunks and sometimes encircle their roots. Humans carve craziness into their trunks. Yet somehow, every day they manage to keep reaching for the sun; even when it’s cloudy. It all makes me feel quite inept as a human being.
Something in The Green heard me and answered my query. It told me, all nature just is. When I accept the nature of all being and allow things to be as they are, I will be able to stand through anything as well– until I don’t stand anymore. When I am no longer standing that will just be too. My problem, or rather what causes my confusion is the expectation that Motherhood is to be a certain way at any given moment. Things do not have to be any particular way. Everything just is.
Nope still not ready for that answer. I have many many many expectations about Motherhood and who I am supposed to be as a Mother. The Green has a great point though. There is peace in accepting things as they are. I wonder what I value more: peace or the pain of self judgment and censure. At the end, I’ll choose what I value more. I am realizing that I have all I need to engage what I most value– which include trees.
I love the trees <3
Hope things are being good to you.. Until next time